Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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