I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
