so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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