I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man