If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
