everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
