i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
