Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
