tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
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your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize