there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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