Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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