I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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