Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
