I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
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