'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
