This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
