All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Randomize
