Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Randomize
