I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
