if only i could text you this smell
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
