I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
