kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
whose ass print is on the piano?
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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