ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
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