I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
