I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
