I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
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