its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
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