put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
