My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
