angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize