At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
