I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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