Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
