im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
