We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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