i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have grass duct taped all over my body
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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