just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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