im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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