Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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