I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
