reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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