Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
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