I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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