I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Your cock deserves a montage
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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