tell your sister to shave her snatch
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
