oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Randomize
