I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
