Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Couch. On fire.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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