The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize