Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
